When Do You Say, “Yes, Dear”?

I have trouble keeping my mouth shut.  I believe that situations will improve if things are discussed, if people can communicate honestly, and if folks say what’s on their mind.  I’m really, really good about saying what’s on my mind.

This occasionally  causes conflict in my marriage.  So, I’m wondering . . . when do you just say “Yes, Dear.”?

I know all about “pick your battles” and I’m pretty good at that.  I mean, I do my absolute best to not argue over petty things, let little slights go, etc.  But when do the petty things add up to “too much!”?  When do the little slights turn into one big “F___ you.”?

I think the timing of discussions versus a simple “Yes, Dear.” is important.  I try to not start discussions late in the evening, when I know husband is tired from his long days at work.  I try to not interrupt when he’s in the middle of something.  But I also don’t believe there’s a “perfect time” for anything.  And, like I said, I find “Yes, Dear” very difficult in general.

Does it matter who’s right or who’s wrong?  Does it matter the degree of right-ness or wrong-ness??  Is it subject matter that’s important?  If I manage a “Yes, Dear”, is it fair to bring up the subject again later?  Is a “Yes, but . . .” reasonable?

O.k., I get that all those things are important . . . so maybe its just a matter of balance.  I know there’s not one right answer here.  Maybe I just need to practice “Yes, Dear” more and I’ll figure out the nuances.

Any suggestions?  When do you use “Yes, Dear.”?

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Author: StoriLines

California girl, attorney, mom, wife. Things I love (in no particular order): the beach, rain, my kids, all my pets, reading, traveling, coffee!

1 thought on “When Do You Say, “Yes, Dear”?”

  1. Saying the right thing at the right time and great communication is key. You and your spouse both need to know that even though you disagree you are both still working as a team. When disagreements arise it really doesn’t matter who is right and who is wrong. Both spouses should really LISTEN and communicate in an effective manner in order to be understood.
    Take a look at my blog for married couples http://www.loftforum.wordpress.com

    Like

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