The other day, some of the ladies at work were, yet again, discussing their need to lose weight. I laughed and said, “Yeah, you guys will lose weight when I speak Spanish.” (Its o.k., we have that type of relationship so they weren’t offended.)
But it really got me thinking . . . this is a conversation I have with so many of my women friends. The desire to do this or that . . . and the absolute lack of sustained progress.
It really got me thinking . . . What is holding us back??
In my last post, I asked “What would success look like?” The question of “What’s holding us back?” is a little different.
I posed that question to my good friend and she answered, “Fear.”
O.k., but fear of what exactly??
I asked my Mom. She answered that she doesn’t like to be noticed so she thinks that’s what’s holding her back from losing weight, dressing better, etc. . . . someone might then notice her if she were attractive. To which I replied, “Well, maybe people are noticing now and thinking how frumpy you look.” (O.k., so maybe that wasn’t very nice of me but I think it was a legitimate point.)
Back to fear. I know that for me and Spanish (because that’s an easy example), I have the immediate fear that people are going to think I’m stupid or sound funny in my beginning attempts at speaking Spanish. Logically, I know the people I can practice with will absolutely not make fun of me but the fear is still there.
But what’s beyond that? What if I did accomplish some of my goals? Would I be able to internalize that success? Would I be more confident? Would people then expect more of me? And, to my Mom’s point, would people notice me more? Am I comfortable with that? What would my husband say if I stepped out of my comfort zone and did well? What would my friends say? (I know “true” friends support you no matter what, blah, blah, blah).
Aaaahhhh . . . so much unknown!!!! So maybe my friend was right. Maybe it is fear that’s holding us back, plain and simple.